The Steel Cage

Match 1: Primo Colon defeated. William Regal
This was the first time for most fans seeing Carlito’s younger brother. He looked to be in good shape, but was a little green in some of his offense. Regal got big heel heat and loud “Regal sucks” chants. Colon won with a backslide.

Kelly Kelly was introduced as the roving host of the show and awarded some fans in the nosebleeds front row tickets.

Match 2: Lance Cade defeated D-Lo Brown.
Brown got a nice pop from the crowd. I’m surprised that many people remembered him, considering it’s been about five years since he was in WWE. There wasn’t much to this match. D-Lo missed the frog splash, and Cade hit his modified sidewalk slam finisher for the win.

Kelly Kelly plucked some kid out of the front row to be a guest manager later tonight. He cried and freaked out, so they got another kid.

Match 3 for the Women’s Championship: Beth Phoenix defeated Mickie James.
Pretty good action. The Glamazon won clean with her finisher.

Match 4: Jamie Nobel defeated Snitsky by submission.
You read that right. I was as surprised as you are. Nobel came to the ring with his guest manager, a kid who really hammed it up and got into it, slapping hands at ringside and posing for the crowd. This was as bad as you would expect a Snitsky match to be. Nobel slapped a front choke on Snitsky, and after a few seconds, Snitsky tapped out. After the match, Snitsky kicked Nobel in the face, and Nobel sold it like he had been killed. Crew members tended to him in the ring.

Match 5 for the World Tag Team Championship: Cody Rhodes & Ted Dibiase defeated Cryme Tyme.
After having their belts stolen on Raw the previous week, Rhodes & Dibiase came to the ring sans-straps, and cut a decent promo. Rhodes said that Cryme Tyme committed larson, and asked the fans “What does it say about you?” that they would cheer for them. DiBiase said a publicly traded company like WWE should be no place for “two thieving thugs.” Both men snuck in references to Cryme Tyme being from NY, hoping to further get them over with the fans. I’m not sure they needed it, as Shad and JTG got a huge pop when they came out with the belts. The ref gave the champs their belts back before the match. The action was OK. There was a long build up for a JTG hot tag into Shad, which also got a big reaction from fans. In the end, Cody just struck Shad while he covered Dibiase, and that was enough for Dibiase to get the win. After the match, Cryme Tyme stole the belts again, and the heels through a tantrum outside the ring.

Intermission.

Match 6 for the Intercontinental Championship: Santino Marella (w. Beth at ringside) defeated Kofi Kingston.
Santino did some good mic work while some of the fans were stilling at the bathrooms and concession stands. He sang his own rendition of New York, New York, with the lyrics, “Start spreading the news, I’m not going to lose. I am the Intercontinental champion, two times, times two.” He also talked about how he carried Beth to their win at SummerSlam. He introduced his new finisher, the “Mazaradi Clutch.” There was decent action in this match, which ended when Santino rolled up Kofi for the win.

Match 7: John Cena & Dave Batista defeated Chris Jericho & Kane.
At various points during the last several months, this card was supposed to feature a Highlight Reel, Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho in a cage, John Cena vs. Batista, John Cena vs. Chris Jericho, and Batista vs. Kane. In the end, we got this, which was pretty good.

Jericho cut another terrific promo before the match, in which he blamed the fans for Shawn Michael’s wife being injured at SummerSlam, and again bragged about how HBK would never wrestle again. He said HBK was a liar and a phony, like Batista and Cena. Kane came in to some new instrumental entrance music, which is similar to his original music from way back when. Cena came out first on his team, and got an obscenely loud pop. It’s really amazing how much the women and kids love this guy. Batista got a respectable reaction too. The babyfaces posed together as pyro shot off.

The match built to a Batista hot tag to Cena, who cleaned house. He gave Kane the F.U. for the win. After the match Batista posed with a sign that read, “Batista Hates Cancer.” Not that it’s any of my business, but some people with knowledge of Batista’s personal life may have something to say about that.

Match 8 for the World Heavyweight Championship inside the confines of a 15-foot high steel cage! C.M. Punk defeated John Bradshaw Layfield.

Sadly, a good deal of fans left after the Cena/Batista tag match, and missed what was the best match of the night.

They had the first row of fans set back about 15-20’ from ringside to accommodate the crew members who set up the ring. It took about a dozen men just nine minutes to erect the cage. Pretty impressive. Since these days cages are simply lowered onto the ring during televised matches, cage construction has become something of a lost art form.

Some traditionalists criticize WWE for their unique cage match rules, in which wrestlers can win by escaping the cage. The argument is that you’re essentially awarding the win to the biggest coward. But I’ve always liked the WWE-style cage match. The escape rules create another level of drama that fans definitely get into. Anybody my age fondly remembers watching replay after replay to determine whose feet touched the floor first – Hulk Hogan’s or Paul Orndorff’s.

JBL cut a great promo before the match, in which he kept referring to himself as New York’s “favorite native son.” He said tonight would be remembered as one of the most historic nights in Madison Square Garden history. He added, “I’ve never paid to see anybody do anything, but you all just paid to see me.”

Punk got a nice reaction from fans, but nowhere near what Cena or even Batista got. The two men wrestled a good old-style cage match, but without any blood. There was some great unintentional comedy when the door accidentally got jammed, and some poor young ref struggled for several minutes trying to get it open before the match-ending sequence. When he finally got it free, the crowd popped big.

There was a big spot when Punk jumped off the top of the cage, but JBL got out of the way. He hit the Clothesline from Hell, but Punk kicked out. In the end, the two men battled near the open door, and JBL punched Punk, sending him flying out the door and onto the arena floor, causing Punk to win the match.

After the match, Punk gave JBL the Go To Sleep on the arena floor. He spent several minutes walking around the ringside area slapping hands, and then re-entered the cage and did snow angels on the mat. For a guy who just a couple years ago was working independent shows – and just months ago was a mid-card player in WWE’s C-brand – it must have be surreal to be defending the world heavyweight championship in a main event cage match in Madison Square Garden. It’s nice to see him enjoying every minute of his reign.

This wasn’t the best house show I’ve ever been to, but after getting nostalgic from watching so many editions of WWE MSG Classics and old Garden house shows on WWE 24/7, it was fun traveling back in time for a night.