HAPPY NEW YEAR, ALL! ... yeah, even you, Staple and Rock.
1. Chargers (14-2) (1): One of Marty Schottenheimer’s best coaching jobs. But it’s January now, and the only number that matters is 5-12 – Schottenheimer’s playoff record.
2. Ravens (13-3) (3): Why does no one talk about these guys in Super Bowl terms? It’s time to take them very seriously.
3. Bears (13-3) (2): Can there be any more angst for a potential Super Bowl team after a meaningless Week 17 loss to the Packers? Just ask Rex Grossman.
4. Patriots (12-4) (4): As the old saying goes: Whenever you have Bill Belichick as your coach and Tom Brady as your quarterback, you always have a chance.
5. Saints (10-6) (5): One of the most heartwarming stories of the year can get even better with a Super Bowl run. Saints get all-important week off to think about the possibilities.
6. Eagles (10-6) (6): Momma McNabb is worried Eagles fans will forget about her son if the Birds go deep into the playoffs. Keep worrying, Mrs. M.
7. Colts (12-4) (7): Terrible run defense against Larry Johnson in wild card round. Can you say one and done?
8. Jets (10-6) (11): Eric Manginius tries to beat the master one more time. But it may be asking too much to beat Belichick twice in one season … on the road, no less.
9. Seahawks (9-7) (9): Costly win over Tampa means Seahawks secondary will be hurting. But at least they’ve got some home cookin’ against the Cowboys.
10. Cowboys (9-7) (8): Did you see Tuna bury his face in his hands after Jon Kitna’s fourth touchdown pass? Could be more of the same in Seattle next weekend.
11. Chiefs (9-7) (15): Chiefs sneak in through the back door, thanks – as usual – to Larry Johnson’s heroics. Herm Edwards will call his number again plenty in Indy.
12. Titans (8-8) (12): You’d better believe defensive coordinators will study Belichick’s plan against Vince Young. It might be the only way to stop the guy.
13. Rams (8-8) (16): Woulda shoulda coulda. Rams got hot early and got hot late, but too cold in the middle cost them a playoff berth.
14. Broncos (9-7) (10): Nothing else matters after Darrent Williams was shot and killed. Our deepest sympathies to his family, friends and teammates.
15. Jaguars (8-8) (13): Put Jack Del Rio on the hot seat in ’07.
16. Steelers (8-8) (18): If Bill Cowher steps down as expected, what a way to end it all – beating hated Bengals in overtime on the road.
17. Giants (8-8) (20): Tom Coughlin sticks around another week. But a loss at Philly, and there’s no guarantee he coaches in New York next year.
18. Bengals (8-8) (14): A season that held such promise goes up in flames at home on the final weekend.
19. Panthers (8-8) (17): Jake Delhomme comes back from a thumb injury, but it’s too late. One of the most disappointing teams of the year goes out with a meaningless win over the Saints.
20. Bills (7-9) (19): All in all, not as bad a season as we expected. But will the Bills ever get past mediocre?
21. Packers (8-8) (24): Post-game tears at Soldier Field tells you Brett Favre will hang ‘em up. Thanks for the memories. One of our top 5 players to watch … ever.
22. 49ers (7-9) (23): Niners ruin Broncos’ playoff hopes on the road to complete a halfway decent season. With Seahawks falling back a notch, can these guys contend for an NFC West title in ’07? Could be.
23. Falcons (7-9) (21): Jim Mora Jr. is out of a job, but don’t look for any sympathy from Michael Vick, who really is a coach killer ... just like Mora's daddy said.
24. Dolphins (6-10) (22): Alabama wants Nick Saban badly. We’ll see if he walks away, or whether Wayne Huizenga holds him to his contract.
25. Redskins (5-11) (25): Worst NFL season ever for Joe Gibbs, who vows to come back next year and make it work. We’ll see.
26. Vikings (6-10) (26): Brad Childress had better start talking to his players, or else he’ll have a locker room insurrection before long.
27. Texans (6-10) (27): Jake Plummer to the Texans in 2007?
28. Buccaneers (4-12) (28): Chucky devastated by injuries and aging defense, so he’s hoping turnaround next year. If not, then he might be gone.
29. Cardinals (5-11) (29): Dennis Green gets the heave-ho after three brutal seasons.
30. Lions (3-13) (31): Lions beat Cowboys in regular season finale. Must be time for a contract extension for GM Matt Millen.
31. Browns (4-12) (30): Romeo Crennel on the hot seat, regardless of ownership’s vote of confidence last month.
32. Raiders (2-13) (32): Could be over for Art Shell after just one season.