Celtics bench not getting much better
Dikembe Mutombo is apparently not interested in moving to Boston to bring his defensive ability (and engaging personality) to the Green Monsters. That's good news for the Knicks, because Mutombo showed last season he still can bring the swat team to the house.
Danny Ainge's Plan B was Scot Pollard, the guy who spent most of the past season buried deep on the Cleveland Cavaliers bench. This is better news for the Knicks, because we already know Kendrick Perkins is foul prone. Eddy Curry should devour Pollard.
I don't know much about Pollard's game because I didn't get to see much of him (he played a total of nine minutes in four games against the Knicks this season and had two fouls in four minutes in the final meeting between the teams on March 28, a 97-93 win for the Knicks at the Garden).
All I know is he's clearly this generation's version of the weird white guy. Every generation has one (but he's no Kurt Rambis, who actually had championship-caliber game to go along with his Buddy Holly goggles.)
Of course, Scot does also bring to the table regrettable catch phrases such as, "Hey kids, do drugs."
Brilliant.
But we already knew he loves drawing attention to himself. So this season, I'd love to see Scot pay homage to Brian "Veal" Scalabrine, and go pumpkin orange with his doo. Or maybe don the outfit of Lucky the Leprechaun while he's on the bench.
(Can you tell it's August and I don't have much else to blog right now?)
Ainge hopes Pollard can give up some productive minutes off the bench defending the low post, which he proved he could do during his best years with the Sacramento Kings behind Vlade Divac and Chris Webber. And getting him for the V.M. is good for the budget. But if that's your safety net for Kendrick Perkins, I'd hate to see what the plan is for backing up Rajon Rondo.
Ainge also said the team can also lean on 6-9 rookie Brandon Wallace, one of Renaldo's homies from SC. Wallace, you know, wasn't drafted. They signed him after the summer league.
As you all know -- especially you Jon, my unofficial Nets corespondent -- Ainge signed Eddie House last week to put some depth in the backcourt. But he said yesterday he's still looking for some point guard help because, we all know, House is a shooter, not a playmaker.
Just what a team with Paul Piece, Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett needed, a shoot-first point guard.
Lookin good, Danny.
* *
I received the craziest Comment to date on the blog yesterday from someone who used the handle, Ali-G. I had to share.
Check it:
"Yo, Dis be Ali-G and I be checkin youself before you wreck yourself...Respek, Alan Con! Me boys from da Knicks knation blog be tellen me dat you is da real ting! Dat you is Da new Mac daddy of da Knicks! Well den answer me dis one question if you is da new man! What does da Knicks stand for? Who does you think is da MP3 of da Knicks? Does da Knicks get Arrested dis year from da Kings? Can Nate play center win Curry needs a breather? Does you inspire to be on MBA Teli like da fat guy who leads da Knick blog at Daily News? Yo listen up my new main man Alan Con! Dis be Ali-G and me boys BARF, Lives in Trenton-Loves Bushwick, AntiNyspots, Bobby Darren, Americanafrican, Kandiland, ed Grossman, Unsteady, A-Trane, Bronxboys in md 20-20, Dajohn, Tinman, Kevin harlemwood, Mak the boat person, all follow me lead! So Alan Con, com wif da truth and you will be the new Mac daddy of da Knicks! Me has read many of you entries and you doesnt seem like a player hater! If you are keepin it real den we will blog REGYOULARR! Every day! Are you da Jewish? If you is it's ok as long as you don't leave us hanging on Martin luther King Day! And , you doesnt trie to coverge us! I worry dat religion may keep us from serious knick bloggin! Answer me dis one final question so I knows dat RELIGION WON'T AFFECT dis new Blog! Why did Jesus go round wif all dem reindeer? Answer dat and you have me RESPECK! Keepin it real, listen up out dare and lean something from da answers of my new main Man, Alan CON! Respeck. Westside!"
I'm a fan of Sacha Baron Cohen, so I'll allow myself some fun (and make fun of myself) and take a shot at an Ali-G reply:
'ow can i not respond to yous, ali-g. it's chill to check so many of yous migratin ova in da house to dis blog, which i oped would become da colbert nation of dese knick blogs. my readers and posters is wot make dis strong.
lemme take on your inquiries one at a time:
knicks is short fa knickabockers, as da crew was called by da crew’s founda, ned irish (i guess celtics was takun). knickerbocker was somewhat of a istorical reference to new york turf’s dutch settlers. short pants were called “knickers” or “knickerbockers.” there was also a famous characta from da early 20f century called “fatha knickerbocker” who did ave da short pants (and a wig…but nothin like dat marv alberts be rockin).
nate is too short to play ouse. but he as more blocks against yao min than eddy does, so who knows.
don’t hate on frankie ice and is tv gig. he knows people. and e’s foldin bank.
i’m not jewish. i’m a catholic mutt (german, irish, french-canadian, blackfoot indian and probably a little Lab-Shep) who put in my time. 12 years of catholic school befo' 4 years of college burned all me credit. da goal now is to keep myself on da plus side as best i can so i die wit da good cred ratin.
leave you hangin on martin lutha king day? never. i’m like jerry maguire: i’m mista black people. two tings i hate de most are peoples who don't tolerate other peoples cultures and the dutch.
da Jesus question about reindea i can’t answa. i just dig to know why he ate chocolate bunnies on Easta. but i for real dig da Man. is old man was a carpenta, which i respect. and i know my old man, who also worked wit is ands, is there wiv bof of them. guidin me and shakin is ead each time i do da fings e’d advise me not to do. like reply to dis comment.
peace. eastside, wes-side, all-around da turf.
Yes, I owe you all a better effort in the next blog....Show of hands, what do we want to discuss. Here are your options:
1. Breakdown the Knicks top 8 rotation.
2. A summer report card on each player and what we hope they've improved on
3. Ranking the East as it stands right now
4. Comparing the talent of the current Knicks roster to what's been here the past five years
5. Will the sexual harassment lawsuit (court date is September) have an impact on the season
Too soon for a mailbag. Let's shoot for late August.
As you can see, the heat is getting to me:
Fool, it's hot! I told you again! Were you born on the sun? It's damn hot! I saw... It's so damn hot, I saw little guys, their orange robes burst into flames. It's that hot! Do you know what I'm talking about?"
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Comments (26)
I vote for Summer reportcard...I'd love to know how Curry has improved and what Crawford is doing to not be a chucker.
HAHAHAHAHA
Oh so priceless.
This is what its all about. Especially after a commute from hell just to get into work.
Thanks Alan. Oh, snap...Peace is a star!!!
I vote for number 4 cuz every other option will be full of speculation. I say, put your knowledge to the test and break down the talent Pre_Isiah (or B.I. Before-Isiah) and the talent now.
And for doodoo chips and giggles, breakdown the Knicks payroll in terms of the roster's relative value. Objectively of course.
It would make for a controversial post, at least. Just my $.02
I vote for number 4 cuz every other option will be full of speculation. I say, put your knowledge to the test and break down the talent Pre_Isiah (or B.I. Before-Isiah) and the talent now.
And for doodoo chips and giggles, breakdown the Knicks payroll in terms of the roster's relative value. Objectively of course.
It would make for a controversial post, at least. Just my $.02
Incredible.
Alan, you've got to stop dragging these compliments out of me. Like BARF, Peace was already a star, but your response is priceless and has won you more fans. Just amazing. a sense of self and humor. Wow.
Sorry, but your buddy F. Ice reaps what he sows. You should talk to him more cause we know people too. Then again, if you do, he might change and we might stay over there.
It's a little hard to get jazzed up when there is really no news. We could do a couple of things that require some thought.
1. Determine what that rotation will be and how it might work. or
2. Talk a little about how we matchup against our Eastern opponents in the regular season. Which teams should we beat based on what we have now.
Otherwise, I can understand the dearth of content. It's as hot as that Twilight Zone episode where the world was ending.
My ultimate respect for the way you handled my boy Ali-G. He be crazy like that.
C'mon BARF, we've done 4 so much that I could argue both sides in two paragraphs, cut and paste style. Didn't you guys argue that for like a full season last year. Speculation takes a little skill with the lineup of posters we have here. Let's go for the challenge instead of the easy stuff.
BTW, you said something at KK that cracked me up. Now I've got to crossover to refresh my memory.
If Larry is so intent on trading Jermaine O'neal, might there be any chance the Knicks could send Zach Randolph Indiana's way? A young, super-legitimate post presence seems a far more desirous piece than anything NJ or even LA has to offer. From the Knicks perspective, O'Neal may be a bit older (although not old) and more injury prone, but he is a far better fit alongside Curry. He is a tremendous defender--see John Hollinger's piece on him a while back, I couldn't find it--and he doesn't need (or want) to be on the block to be a force. Who knows, a little less banging makes Jermaine a little healthier and even better than he has been...
Alan,
I bin said youz gots street creds (maybe). Now, mi say youz git street creds DEFINITELY. On another blog, I found myself "breakin' it down" just to make sure the point got across. That dexterity may be criticized by some but as you have reminded us in past blogs, "this IS a blog".
As "Ali-G" said--"Wez all comin'". Remember the line--"You tell on yourself by the company you keep". Still holding out hope that Tman will chime in any day now to further elaborate on this point. He and Statesman think very deeply.
As the faithful gather-up to "da colbert nation", what's good with #2 and what the fellas did to improve over the summer.
Lee--Heal; handles; turnover; mid-range jumper
Curry--Jumping for rebounds and blocks; handles; free-throws; reducing turnovers; court vision to roll on help defense.
Stephon--Heal the shoulder and toes; entry pass to the post (left/right); alley-oop; the "trey".
Jamal--Heal; the "trey"; free-throws; court vision; game management for when he spells Stephon at the point.
QRich--Heal; the "trey"; free throws.
Gotta run but the rest of the nation will chime in the rest.
KFL
LNJ,LNY
I suppose you're right. I know I've gone through it alot but I thought it'd be cool to see the POV of Alan Con. If he doesn't want to do it, so be it. It's sort of an initiation process for me now. I think I've been blog-brainwashed.
Hi, my name is Be A Real Fan. What do you think of the roster and payroll situation for the Knicks, both pre-Isiah and now? Pleasure to meet you.
HA.
#5 is the most 'Now' topic to paraphrase ESPN Sportscenter (the dumbest segment ever). What if Isiah and Dolan are found guilty? What would happen? However, would writing about the 'what-ifs' about that case effect (or is it affect) your credibilty since they are still innocent until proven otherwise? I would love to hear your opinion about it, though.
Another question I've been puzzling over: barring an Artest trade, which has been talked to death, what is likely to be done to get the roster down to 15? Who goes, and where (given current depth and the need to keep the rookies on the roster) do we really need another player?
Summer Report Card
Alan:
I'd be interested in #1, a breakdown of the rotation. Although whichever way you choose, I'm sure you won't let us down, as other beat writers have.
Alan—you’d better warn us if you expect all blogs to be in dialect from now on. Not sure I’m up to it. But if I’m ever feeling particularly sinister, maybe I’ll write one like my grandmother. Think of it – Bubbie’s BasketBall Blog . . . there’s a feature film in there somewhere: Mild-mannered Jewish grandmother/soldier of fortune suspects terrorists have infiltrated the New York basketball beat writers. The final shoot-out - at MSG, during the 7th game of the NBA finals -- (hey, it’s Hollywood) – is not to be missed. (It’s called 14.95. It retailed at 24, but she had a cousin in the business.)
Sorry. In answer to your question, my priorities would be: 1, 2, 5, 3, 4. Also, if we table the topic of Artest/Lee, etc. for a while . . . how do you see the roster surplus shaking out? Have you heard anything about other possible moves being discussed? I, for one, would love to see both rookies get in a little PT. Do you think there’s ANY chance of that?
Lastly, I’ve gone back and forth about whether to send this or not. I hope you take it the right way. In a weird way, I actually found it uplifting. But it’s on the subject of rock lyrics that came to mind after a father’s death. This is the chorus I couldn’t get out of my head:
“I wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then . . .”
Good luck to you . . .
I think I should hide over here for awhile.
Keep myself out of trouble.
LoL
I vote for breaking down the Top 8. Or maybe the talent comparison.
Can't decide, heat's got me. Do what you think is best, Alan.
Nice post, Alan. It's nice to see some personality from a MSM blog.
Honestly, I vote for more "nonsense" posts like this. The preseason will be here soon, then you can post NBA previews, update us on how the talent looks, etc. In the meanwhile, more entertainment. Go check out some summer street ball games. Take the train to Ruckers. Or prank call Steph and tell us about it.
Or start some beef with Marc Berman and Frank Isola. Write something nasty about their moms!
Alan,
What up, man.
I will dutifully read up to 20,000 words of completely speculative Knick trade scenarios....
Please don't talk about sexual harrassment or what these guys need to improve on. One's negative, one's obvious.
What's your master plan if you were GM for our Knicks to win a title?
Jesse
I vote for #1
Alan,
I have two thoughts:
1. I vote for the Summer Report Card.
2. Please, please don't let this blog become a running joke or a place for banal discussions. Let's keep it the way you started it . . .smart, engaging, unique and thoughtful.
i vote for the summer report card (cuz i watch summer league like a hawk) and the top 8 rotation, cuz i cant figure out a constant top myself
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