The TV Zone

There was no bitterness when Isaiah Washington left "Grey's Anatomy" - and there's no water in the ocean and the moon is actually made of moldy green cheese. (Check it out...it's true..)

But still, viewers could be forgiven for doing a little doubletake a couple weeks ago when Cristina Yang walked by a bulletin board to glance at a pix of Preston Burke; I certainly did, and even backed up to take another look. Was it an obit? What WAS that? (Burke had been awarded something. He had the ol' characteristic blank look...)

It was all incredibly harmless, but now guess what? Washington has filed a complaint with the Screen Actors Guild over the shot! "They have the rights of the character to advance the story, but not the image," his lawyers told ABC's lawyers (according to the Hollywood Reporter.) Yes, IW wants a "financial settlement."

That's right - he deserves money for the emotional trauma this must have caused. May I suggest 34 cents?

After having, oh, 11 or so hours to sleep and think on it, I suppose I should be offering you some deep well-rubbed thoughts about the return of "Grey's Anatomy" - at least thoughts that should be at least as deep and well-rubbed as yours.

But the basic problem, I found, is that absence did not make the heart grow fonder. I think I hoped it would - that there would be some new-found poignancy in the sisterly ties of Meredith and Lexie, or that Derek and Rose would offer a new and intriguing wrinkle, or the bad taste of that misbegotten match of Izzie and George would be long gone, or that Cristina's profoundly comical neediness would be even more profoundly comical.

But no, absence did not make the heart grow fonder. Last night arrived with a tremendous load of backstory, though none of it particularly meaningful. We are all now required to care anew - and I don't know about you, but caring anew is gonna be hard work.

Again, after 11 (now nearly 12) hours, I think I've come to this conclusion: The magic's gone. It was a perfectly OK episode, but perfectly OK is hardly good enough - two months' absence should have offered something much much better. But the "Grey's" formula remains ironclad - that Meredith's inability to stitch her need for love with her need for career holds up a mirror to us (or at least 20 million female viewers), and the on-again/off-again with McDreamy is its reigning - and wrenching - metaphor.

But we know they're destined for each other's arms again, just as we know they're destined to separate again, or until he's off the show entirely for the big screen career. (Depends, I suppose, on how "Made of Honor" does.) It's an old story now. Terribly old. And I just...don't...care.

Yeah, sure, some funny "Housian" moments - when Mere throws up her arms like she's just scored one after diagnosing the guy's tumor. But of course, ultimately NOT funny. Even the humor of "the contest" seemed listless.

Something was missing before. Something still is. For want of a better word, let's just call it "heart."

Don't say we never did anything for you - although, after watching this video, you may come to the conclusion that we never did anything for you.

This is a strange video, but - depending on how desperate you are for diversion at this exact moment - maybe manna from heaven. (Thanks to tvtattle for locating.) Quick backstory: When the strike was in progress Shonda Rhimes got casts from her hit shows to agree to sing at a UCLA fundraiser (raising dough for struggling out-of-work writers.) An intriguing experiment, though (no surprise) Audra McDonald is probably the only one worth paying real money to see. (Sara Ramirez is a big stage talent, too, so, Sara as well.)

In any event, it took place Friday, and apparently someone in the audience held up their cell phone during the thing. Here it is, with fair warning: You haven't seen video this rocky since mom and dad took those old pictures of you jumping into the backyard pool.

“Lost” will have lots of company by April as new episodes return to ABC’s lineup for such faves as “Desperate Housewives” and “Ugly Betty.” In the midst of the post-strike shuffle, “Lost” will move back to 10 p.m. Thursday behind a returning “Grey’s Anatomy” – just in time for May’s Nielsen sweep (April 24 - May 21).

The network has announced the following fresh-episode dates:

“Samantha Who?” - Monday, April 7 at 9:30 p.m. (six new episodes)

“Boston Legal” - Tuesday, April 8 at 10 p.m. (six episodes)

“Desperate Housewives” - Sunday, April 13 at 9 p.m. (five episodes, plus two-hour finale)

“Brothers & Sisters” - Sunday, April 20 at 10 p.m. (four episodes)

“Ugly Betty” - Thursday, April 24 at 8 p.m. (five episodes)

“Grey’s Anatomy” - Thursday, April 24 at 9 p.m. (five episodes)

“Lost” - Thursday, April 24 move to 10 p.m. (five episodes)

Catch up to previous episodes at ABC's streaming media player.

What goes around comes around, and around...and around...and around...

Let's recap: Meredith and Derek are on the ropes again, Izzie's still dizzy, George still needs a back-bone, Sloan can't figure out Hahn who hates/loves him, while Yang desperately wants Hahn to like/love her (fat chance for either) and...

Take a deep breath...

Callie's got an issue with faith (after George, who wouldn't?) while Karev could be filling the space in Izzie's heart after the split with George, unless he ends up with Lexie, which is a distinct possibility, and...

another breath...

Derek and Rose are on again, and it's just a matter of time before Hahn and Sloan hit the hot sheets motel, proving that Hahn (in fact) is not gay (though perhaps bi-), and Miranda's marriage may or may not be on the rocks after her husband let the bookshelf fall on the baby.

Did I miss anything?

"Grey's Anatomy" returns after a longish strike-forced hiatus, and I'm left with the sense that the more things change around Seattle Grace, the more things remain the same. We've only got a few weeks left until the season is over for good, and the question now is - will the producers manage to tie things up by February sweeps?

Some possible plot twists cooked up in the confines of my fetid imagination:

Meredith: Pushes Derek off the hill where he was going to build their dream house, thus allowing Patrick Dempsey to finally pull a George Clooney and head off to a big screen career (adios, Mere!)

Derek: Builds dream house, Rose moves in, they live happily ever after...and then Patrick Dempsey pulls a George Clooney and...etc.

Izzie: Denny Duquette's ghost returns to the hospital and starts dating her again, and residents are concerned when they see her talking to thin air because she's the only one who can see him; Izzie finally goes off the deep end, thus allowing Katherine Heigl to pull a George Clooney...etc.

. George: Hitches up romantically with Yang because - what the hell - he's already been hitched to everyone else.

Miranda: Splits from loser house husband, and walks on wild side by hitching up with Callie, who's decided that gay's the way after George ditched her; show changes name to "Gay's Anatomy."

Sloan: Marries Hahn, who re-makes him into her house husband; stays at home, cooks dinner, tends to babies, and otherwise undergoes major character reversal.

Karev: Still trying to figure out what to do with him, but Webber's gotta figure in this some way. Happy to take suggestions (though don't forget - show has officially changed name to "Gay's Anatomy.")

And speaking of fourth party candidates, how about a fifth party one? For that, I nominate Patrick Dempsey, who's also making the morning talk show rounds to pump "Enchanted." He's not a Dobbsian word-mincer, best I can tell, and when Reeg asked him this morning about the Writers' Strike, he sure didn't look and sound like a guy who was whole-heartedly in the writers' corner, like most every other big name actor who's appeared on picket lines on the left and right
coasts in recent weeks. All the combatants - writers and Big Bad Studio chiefs - "need to come to an understanding and get their egos out of the way," he declared, because some staffers at shows like "Grey's Anatomy" are "living pay check to paycheck. They [writers] deserve something [but] they should resolve this as soon as possible."

What did we learn from last night's "Grey's Anatomy?"

Let's see. That: George pecks like a chicken, and Izzy is starting to have second thoughts, and that Chief's a slob and Shepherd's a neatnik, and Sloan has a thing for Hahn (figures) but that she doesn't for him (and to understand why, see an earlier blog entry), and that Torres really shouldn't be boss and that Bailey should (and now is), and - most shocking of all - Bailey cries! Who saw that coming?

But I think there's something else that we're - or at least I'm - starting to realize. With the strike five days old, and with months - conceivably - to go, who has time, energy or passion to become invested in all of this when you know that in just about four weeks, maybe less, the spigot will be turned off? As the LA Times reported yesterday, "Grey's" is now filming its last episode - though how even that's possible with Shonda Rhimes electing to become fellow travel with other striking writers is a mystery. Meanwhile, "The Office" is gone in two weeks, "The Big Bang Theory" is over this Monday, "Desperate Housewives" is outtahere in early December, and same with "Grey's." I'm sure there are others, many others too.

But serials like "Grey's" and "Desperate" - I suspect - are already feeling the cold shoulder of viewer indifference, either consciously or subconsciously. Who cares whether Lexie or Mere patch things up when we'll be in a "Groundhog Day" loop of endless re-runs, or endless fill-in reality shows? The passion for shows runs cold when you know they are about to be stuffed into the deep freeze, for weeks or maybe even - yes - months? The writers' strike is terrible business - especially for the writers and thousands of support personnel now on the streets too - but the franchises themselves stand to suffer in ways we are only now beginning to understand.

Good Lord, you don't wanna get sick in Seattle Grace. They leave chainsaws with fingers stuck in them, which are then grabbed by guys with crazy legs, who use them to cut off their unruly feet. And the residents are cool with that, because they've got a lot more important things to worry about.

Like, their sex lives.

Which is why I was personally glad to see Dr. Hahn back full time at SG last night. Dr. Hahn is played by the fabulous Brooke Smith (daughter of super-duper-power-flack, Lois), and lemme tell ya, this Brooke ain't no Shields. Why, she's so tough she makes Bo Dietl look like Little Bo Peep. That was a good scene - "good" as in "amusing" - where she goes in to tell the David Clennon-character to say goodbye to his daughter - quickly - because she's gonna cut her heart out. Clennon doesn't appreciate her abrupt bedside manner (who would?! Except maybe Jack the Ripper) and it's left to girly-man George to explain that he'd give HIS heart to HIS father. (Well, good for you, George - the old man's been dead and gone a season. Easy for you to be giving away your heart.)

Anyway, Erica Hahn brings a different dynamic to SG, and if my gaydar isn't broken, I would say this is a lesbian dynamic. I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some lesbian lovin' on "GA" - and as Sloan would put it, it sounds REALLY dirty when you drop the "g." I'm sick and tired of all these whiny hetero homeboys and girls on "Grey's Anatomy." Why, Jane Doe (she calls herself Ava, I think) isn't back an hour, and Karev's off getting "re-acquainted" with her in some laundry closet. Enough! We need adults around here. We also need lesbian love affairs. We need Erica Hahn. The story possibilities are limitless: Yang, dispensed by Burke, gets back at him by throwing herself into the arms of his old nemesis. Or: Now that none of the nurses will have anything to do with him, Sloan tries to "cure" Hahn; we'll see how THAT turns out. Meredith - ashless and loveless - finds a need to explore her emotional torment in other ways.

And so on. Do you see where I'm going here? That's right. Another "GA" spin-off. I think the Logo network would be interested...

Old 'do but new-found dignity.

Me, I didn't mind last night's "Grey's Anatomy," but - as I think I just mentioned - that's me. You? You may be a different story, and please don't be shy about saying so. But I saw glimmers of hope, which suggested that whatever has ailed this show a few episodes in may be a passing phase, or a new-season rough patch.

The big issue - Izzie had turned into a complete dope, without compass bearing or focus or (most glaringly) dignity. Meanwhile, the show itself - which has seemed to struggle weekly on exactly what point of view it wants to take with certain characters - offered no clues and instead allowed Izzie to fall deeper into a post-Denny-Duquette funk that threw her into the arms of George, who (in turn) was also wrecked as a sympathetic core character.

Anyway, last night, "Grey's" tried to set matters straight. I actually liked the cafeteria scene, when Izzy put up her dukes, and then Callie deflated her with just one casual prick - "I came to talk..." Izzie, unattached balloon that she has become, visibly deflated right there on the spot. It was a good night for Callie, in a way, because she (as well she should) became the moral core that has eluded the show, and by so doing, gave true and much needed perspective on the George/Izzie fling. Callie reminded viewers what was so grievously wrong with it, and SHE reminded viewers what damage had been done - and, incidentally, the damage done to the show. (Even though Karev probably had the best observation, saying how pathetic she had become.) I say all this because it seems to me that at least "Grey's" is attempting to ground itself again, or (apologies for the mixed metaphors) trying to get that
damned compass working again.

That's good, but it's just a start.

Okay, "Grey's Anatomy:" You want truth. We'll give you the truth. The whole truth. The Nothing But the Whole Truth. So help me the-Big-Guy-Upstairs.

You need to get back on track. You need to relocate the center. You need to make us care about the characters again, or most of them, and make us feel that what's happening to them is worth feeling a little passionate about - not a little annoyed about. And most of all, you need to make Izzie whole again - not some cheap cardboard cutout who just can't get her emotions together, and seems, no is, increasingly like some pretty twitty snitty non-entity. "I'm blondie. I'm the other woman. I'm a bad fifties cliche." There: Izzie even gave you the truth herself.

Last night wasn't bad; it was simply forgettable, and three episodes in, that's not where you want to be. My feeling - and take it or leave it - is that "Grey's Anatomy" is currently one of the most important shows on television because it re-captured a vast audience when an army of pundits said that probably couldn't be done again with an ensemble drama; it (and "D Housewives" and "Lost," both of which also proved otherwise) turned around ABC, too, by turning around 20 million heads. But those heads are nodding off.

Last night, there were sparks, but sparks do not make a series; they simply serve to remind us what was once so good and now seems so lost. The writing, for example: Intermittently crisp (like that good scene between Mere and Cristina: "You surgery stealer," said Mere, "You owe me a surgery." "You owe me sex details," said C.) Cristina's false grief - that's good too, and she's good, as always. Miranda's windy put-down of Karev, concerning interns - good too. Plus Ed Herrmann, as the newest/oldest intern, Norm. This cameo has possibilities.

But this Izzy/George/Callie triangle? Not good. The dynamics are off-kilter, and it all feels as passionate as a wet noodle. George, with the puppy dog eyes and the quivering chin, may be a certain type of female fantasy figure - gentle, weak, and malleable, a doughboy, or a puppydog that can be house trained, or a bowl of warm milk. (I guess his nickname should be McCreamy.) But Izzy's willful disregard of Callie's feelings makes her (and him) increasingly unlikeable - and to a certain extent, shouldn't she be a sympathetic figure if we're to care about her and her feelings at ALL? We don't, or I don’t, and that's hurting Izzie - and hence, Katherine Heigl - as a vital Seattle Grace lifeforce.

The other relationships seem drained as well - even Mere and Lexie seem to be charging down the path of confrontation and revelation too quickly. It's palpably draining its dramatic possibilities, while the eventual hookup of Karev/Lexie is now becoming so foreshadowed that no one will be surprised, least of all us, when it's finally consummated.

Enough of today's gripe session. I will check back next week. I know you will too.

For a while - like two years - ABC declined to send review copies of "Grey's Anatomy" to TV scribes for the simple reason that it didn't HAVE to send review copies, which meant we had to watch like civilians. But guess what? Mindful of just how far out of favor this massive hit has fallen in some quarters (if last season's endless on-line gripe sessions were good indications) it's gone ahead and sent tonight's episode out for review.

So, from a long-standing "GA'" perspective, here's my quick assessment - good, but still, something's missing. Maybe this: After two and a half seasons of emotional triage among the character mainstays, one begins to ask, how much more triage can any mainstay undergo before that little heart monitor machine attached to 20 million viewers starts to flat-line? Let's count the numerous triages under way at the moment: Izzie loves George and George loves Izzie (but now Callie is starting to suspect.) Cristina has been abandoned by Burke and she's back to square one (and confronting the classic "GA" paradox - emotional fulfillment or career fulfillment?) Meredith's on-again off-again with Derek (and I've kinda lost count how many times this has gone on) has entered another phase, which we'll call Kinda On-gain (But The Clock is Ticking...) Her sister is here now, too, which is good because this at least gives Grey another emotional crisis, and "GA" another vein to tap. Webber's trying to repair things with his wife (still), and who knows WHAT gives with Miranda Bailey. Addison's gone of course and the only guy around here who isn't dripping with angst, anxiety, fear, loathing, paranoia, or love problems is Mark Sloan. (So what else is new?)

I'm not gonna get into plot points about tonight because I've learned that just bugs fans, but tonight's theme is "addiction," along with all its various manifestations. Again, it all feels like good old solid "Grey's," but somehow twice removed, or less-than-fresh, or a little worked over just one too many times. Therein lies the challenge of any major hit - keep the show firmly tethered to the mooring that made it so successful in the first place, yet strike out in new directions as well, and make fans fall in love with the object of their affection all over again. "GA's" trying - boy, it's trying - but still...

Meanwhile, I've buried my lead: Diahann Carroll is back as Jane Burke – Burke’s tough moma - and I hope it's not giving too much away to say she arrives unannounced in the waiting room where she dispenses wisdom, reprimands, tough love, and closure. I suspect this will be the last we see of dear Jane, but who knows…

TV DVDs are coming out fast and furious now that the fall season is immiment. (Newsday’s TV fall preview runs in the Sunday paper of Sept. 16.)

And it’s nice to see that even subsequent-season sets are including more extras these days, which hasn’t always happened in the past. (Still doesn’t for most vintage series.)

“Grey’s Anatomy” Season 3 arrives on disc today (the fourth season hits ABC’s air Sept. 27) in a “seriously extended” edition that includes four episodes presented with substantial unaired content, in addition to the usual array of deleted scenes and bloopers. Three commentaries are fun and informative: the season premiere with give-and-take between Chandra Wilson and “Private Practice” spinoff star Kate Walsh; the Ellis-is-lucid-again hour, discussed by on-screen mom and daughter Kate Burton and Ellen Pompeo, and “Desire,” with Sandra Oh. You even get to hang with Patrick Dempsey off-duty at stock car races. This wasn’t a great season, but featurettes like one on the Jane Doe character highlight what did work.

“Desperate Housewives” Season 3 hit shelves last week, with a featurette going behind the scenes of the matrimonial season finale. No commentaries here (might have been especially nice on event episodes like the “Bang” supermarket hostage-taking), but other featurettes summarize the season’s storylines and compare ABC’s “DH” with a South American version. Deleted scenes and bloopers, too. (Season 4 starts on ABC Sept. 30.)

What, no “What About Brian?”

That seemed like the only series ABC didn’t announce Wednesday as getting an early renewal for the 2007-2008 fall season. “Lost,” “Grey’s Anatomy” and “Desperate Housewives” will be back, as expected, along with freshman faves “Brothers & Sisters,” “Ugly Betty” and “Men in Trees.” Also coming back is “Boston Legal.”
[Above: George and Izzie have plenty of time to sort it out now that "Grey's" has gotten a fall renewal. ABC photo by Vivian Zink.]

ABC’s other fall pickups were unscripted series: the smash hit “Dancing With the Stars,” the declining romance competition “The Bachelor,” reliable Sunday feel-good “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition,” and late-night talkfest “Jimmy Kimmel Live.” Previously announced were the seemingly immortal (and inexpensively produced) “America’s Funniest Home Videos” (on ABC since 1990), “Supernanny” and “Wife Swap.”

That’s 14 series, if you’re counting, already attached to a fall schedule normally announced in its entirety in mid-May, during the week of networks’ annual advertiser presentations known as the upfronts.

Among the shows not on ABC’s early-renewal list: any sitcoms. That’s not a huge show of faith in “George Lopez,” “According to Jim” or “The Knights of Prosperity,” which ABC had been rumored to be relaunching next season with a Ray Romano arc of episodes left unaired when the midseason entry was sent on hiatus. “Lopez” and “Jim” have mostly been used recently to plug lineup holes when fresher series failed (which was frequently).

Fox also announced a pickup Wednesday for the third season of “Prison Break,” which has broken out beyond prison into a massive government conspiracy. It joins other Fox returnees “House,” “Bones,” “The Simpsons,” “American Idol” and “MADtv.” Also surely coming back: animated cult fave “Family Guy,” the Saturday reality lineup of “Cops” and “America’s Most Wanted,” and new quiz hit “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” Not to mention “24.”

NBC got the whole quick-pickup game going in January, when it announced fall renewals for “Heroes,” “The Office,” “My Name Is Earl,” and “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.” Fans of “Friday Night Lights” should keep their fingers crossed.

Other shows already ordered for at least one more season include NBC’s “ER” and “Las Vegas,” CBS’ “Survivor,” and The CW’s “Everybody Hates Chris.”

She's back! She's alive! She's breathing! She said "ouch!" What would we do without one well-timed sweeps stunt that left us waiting breathlessly - no, wrong word - for one week?

Meredith Grey was revived last night at precisely 9:46: Eyes fluttered, pulse revived, skin turned from ghastly blue to ghastly white, and - most remarkable of all - Miranda Bailey almost smiled.

Amazing? Not really. Expected. We learned at least two main things from last night's "Grey's Anatomy." First of all, very few series continue - arguably none - when the character for which they are named is killed off. In TV terms, this just would not do. You'd have to re-name the series ("Grey's Ghost") or do a lot of flashbacks ("Grey's Anatomy: The Early Years.") Not that this couldn’t be done, it's just, what's the point? We also learned that the land of the dead in "GA" terms is not exactly a fun place to be: It's dark and sterile, still pretty much a hospital room best I could tell, and everyone there is cynical and louche. They've all given up - except Meredith, who whined incessantly about the need to go back to the land of the living; one reason, she explained, was that she still had "intimacy" issues. Funny line.

Last night's show was a classic sweeps weeper. Meredith passing Mom in the hallway - so to speak - of life: "You're anything but ordinary, Meredith..." Doc Webber telling Doc Ellis Grey - played by Kate Burton, who was pretty darned good during her dozen-or-so episodes - "I miss the sound of your voice, I miss talking to you, I miss you..."

Hold on a minute. I just have to grab a hankie...Okay, that's better...

And course, the piece de resistance: Denny passing Izzie Stevens and that fleeting moment when she knew - yes, she knew! - that he was right there by her side.

I wonder if he knows she's blown all his money already?

By the way, last night should finally settle one of the big questions of the season: Is Denny Duquette - Jeffrey Dean Morgan - ever coming back? Only if Izzie dies for a few episodes, but that's a stunt for next February.

She's feeling much better, and thanks for asking.

Maybe he'll be back next season - when Izzie's not feeling too well.

Was that Bruce from “Jaws” there in the water with Meredith in last Thursday’s “Grey’s Anatomy”? Hmm, methinks the shark jump may have occurred here.

Not that I was ever a “Grey’s” devotee. It’s entertaining enough soap opera, but the show has always taken itself a tad too seriously for my taste. Teenage girl seriously. All those mopey ballads playing in the background. All the unlikely opposites-attract love affairs. All those ultra-meaningful glances and dovetailing events. Even the episode titles are taken from (sigh) “significant” songs (“The First Cut Is the Deepest,” “Owner of a Lonely Heart,” “From a Whisper to a Scream”). Oddly enough, I’m actually a sucker for that “here’s the existential meaning” narration done by title star Ellen Pompeo. She’s good. I gave the slickly made show a positive review when it debuted in March 2005, which was more than most critics did. But three seasons in, I’ve had enough.

First true shark sighting: Four weeks ago, with the simultaneous marriage proposals (Burke-Yang and George-Callie). Too quick, too cute, too aren’t-we-clever.

Second shark sighting: When a silly soap tries to go epic, you’re in trouble. You’re in the land of helicopters chopping off doctors’ arms, then returning to crash-land on the victim fatally just weeks later (see Paul McCrane’s “ER” character arc). Three weeks for the “Grey’s” ferry crash to play out this February sweeps? Another sad sign. [At right: ABC photo by Vivian Zink.]

Definitive shark sighting: The big tease, ponderously rendered. We’re killing off the lead character! And -- and -- she’s going to have a near-death experience in the afterlife! With ghosts from previous episodes! The concluding moments of last Thursday’s hour had me looking for a barf bag.

Sorry, this isn’t a gray area anymore. Just like Meredith foundering in the drink off the pier -- as the mute little girl looks on mournfully (paging Mr. Shark!) -- “Grey’s Anatomy” is going down for the third time. Glug, glug.

(With thanks, as always, to Jump the Shark creator Jon Hein of Melville.)

So we have a "death" on "Grey's Anatomy:" Meredith.

Who would have figured? You're the daughter of a surgeon, and aren't doctors the ones who are always telling parents to teach their kids how to swim? The lesson, obviously, was never passed on to Mere, unless - that is - this was all part of the disappearing act she's been flirting with this arc (insane mothers, I guess, can do that to some people.) Just to catch up, Grey - Ellen Pompeo - was accidentally knocked into the drink last week by someone she was helping after the ferry accident. The little girl looked on, then wandered away.... Then last night, Derek Shepherd started to wonder - where the heck is Meredith in all this mayhem, and (as luck would have it and always seem to in TV sweeps episodes), located the little girl who JUST happened to know Meredith's name was "Meredith." But don 't tally too long on details like this...He wonders, and asks. She points to the water, and during the commercial break, he finally gets it (and later her.)

By my count, Mere was under water about half the episode, which means when the team revives her next week, she should contact the Guiness Book of Records to get her own entry. Houdini would be jealous. David Blaine would call for advice. (Just think of this act? Meredith the Magnificent! She can't swim but she sure can hold her breath!)

Will Meredith really die? Does this question really need to be asked?