Barber, anyone?
Me like dumb TV.
Me WATCH dumb TV.
Me TV critic who watch dumb TV even when me not have to watch TV.
But hairy man show - "Cavemen" - too dumb even for me, dumb-TV-loving-TV-guy.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm not supposed to be so insensitive. Cavemen: They're just like you and me, only they talk better. And they're hairier. But nice. OK, not really nice, but angry - anger based on eons of prejudice and repression by "sapes," or homo sapiens, not to mention countless bad hair days. And the apparent result? They have absolutely no sense of humor. At all. (But with all that hair, who can blame them! God, there I go again...)
What was ABC thinking? No. I take that back. ABC was not thinking. ABC had a Neanderthal impulse, sprung from a commercial that was kinda funny, but really not THAT funny, and was really only supposed to sell car insurance and not launch new series. Now THIS? "This" is a mistake.
"Cavemen" actually wasn't totally dumb, per se. Just strange: a bitter, snide, borderline nasty, weird TV experience. Not that there's anything wrong with that (per se), as "South Park" can attest. But someone forgot to tell someone that this was supposed to be funny, or at least amusing. It is neither.
Cavemen Nick, Joel, and Andy live together in San Diego. Nick...or it is Joel? I don't know - they all look the same. (There I go again. I'm sorry. Really.) Anyway Joel has a girlfriend, a sape, but Andy's trying (badly) to forget his ex (who I think is also a hirsute one.) Nick’s more metrosexual than caveman - a fancy-talker with inflections and attitude and bile, who pretty much realizes that the hairless world is a shallow soulless trench where cavemen will always be ostracized. Of course, he’s jealous that Joel's dating a gorgeous sape - jealous and dumbfounded.
Mostly these caveguys are interested - no, fixated - on sex, drinking, video games, having a good time, worrying about relationships, fretting about life, and trying to make a go of it in a cold cruel world mostly populated by cold and unattainable women. And they're very immature. It's "Two and a Half Hairy Men" or "It's Always Hairy in Philadelphia."
Those shows, though, are funny.
This one? You have your answer. Ug.