By Mark La Monica
Boy, that Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant story came out of nowhere, huh? At least with Britney, we could see the signs.
This comes just when I was starting to wonder why the tabloids continue to force people to give a hoo-hah about Britney.
I'm still hoping that this is another of those magazine hoaxes, like a few months back when someone made a fake page from J-14 saying that "Hannah Montana" actress Miley Cyrus was with child. Or maybe one of those technical errors like a bunch of years ago when NBC killed Joe DiMaggio on its breaking news crawl months before he actually died.
For the sake of everyone in the Spears family and for the rest of us in Somewhat Sane America, please let this be a hoax. Please!
Given the family history, it's likely 100-percent true. And seeing how Jamie Lynn is 16, Pet Rock will take the high road (does such a road exist in pop culture blogs?) and practice abstinence when it comes to writing any more about this bit of, um, er, uh, "news."
We certainly won't go all Chris Crocker on you and start screaming "Leaving Jamie Lynn alone!" That we promise.
Here's hoping Jamie Lynn raises a productive, well-adjusted child and that Google figures out a way to un-Google things before Lil' Spears learns how to read and use the Internet. No child deserves the wrath Lil Spears is bound to endure in the coming months before he or she enters the world.